why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
Randomize
