your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
This morning I woke up in the entrance of a retirement home. Memory fragments from last night: making it rain with the contents of my wallet over the bridge, getting hit by a car, and a lot of running.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
