i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
