I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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