very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
I can text with my tongue
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
Just want the two of you to know, I went to a golf tournament today. Respectable, expensive… Flipped the golf cart. Seriously, I'm 40. What the fuck?
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Randomize
