Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
This house was built for laser tag.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize
