I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
Dude, she set my Tinder preference to men, set the radius to 100 miles, and used up all of my right swipes. I think she's mad.
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
Randomize
