that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
My cat gives me a boner
Woke up with a retainer in my boxers and about ten chicks passed out around me. now I feel like something out of Cinderella, trying to find whose teeth fit in the glass retainer.
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
I will be naked everywhere
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
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