Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
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