Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
Randomize
