are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
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