the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
He ended our Skype call with, "I'm going to poop and then go play my ukulele in the park."
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
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