He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
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