No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Randomize
