She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
Randomize
