either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
the bouncer watched the girl drop her ID, saw me pick it up and say OMG SHE LOOKS LIKE ME, and then let me use it to get into the bar
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
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