3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
Randomize