i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
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