Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
so I just realized.. of my 70k student loan debt, most of it went toward bar tabs, eightballs, and sweet-ass ties to wear to gamedays and other people's weddings. I think about shit like this while I'm at my mid-level management position. you know. "working."
Look upon your future, America, and despair.
Randomize
