normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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