Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
Fighting the police is like screwing a fat girl, if I'm drunk enough I'll do it
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
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