Screwed.edu
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
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