D3 body, D1 cock
...i apologize for hitting you up so much tonight im just kinda in a little pickle. im going to sleep in my car near u so pretty plz lmk if you head home...
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
Randomize