Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
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