I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Randomize
