Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
I'm like, not good at living.
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
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