How many nights a week you wake up with sticky boxers cause you were dreaming of Clay Aiken? Your wife mad?
i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
