My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
Moment of the day: as we leave the restaurant, she reaches into my pocket, pulls out her panties, and angrily marches to her car. I felt like a sketchy magician.
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
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