reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
I’m inviting a few of my favorite manwhores to a pool party. Bring booze and wear your banana hammock so Amy can see what I’m always talking about
Randomize