I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
Randomize
