That's intense
i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
Randomize
