I'm really into asian looking animals
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
Randomize
