Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
