Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
I wish I could have two rating systems on iTunes. "This one is a 5 star. This one is only a 5 star when I'm baked."
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
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