In the future we'll all be gay
People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
Randomize
