I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
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