Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
I think I just sat on my labia. Can I borrow some scotch tape?
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
Randomize
