I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
Randomize
