I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
