We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
So I hogged the stall at Denny's for so long that a little kid shit his pants and ran crying to his mother. Am I a terrible person for this being the proudest moment of my life?
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize
