i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
I spent most of the stoned conversation with my dad proving to him that the Newfoundland is an actual dog and NOT a Snuffaluffagus-esque figment of my stoned imagination, while laughing over the fact there is actually a place caller Dildo, Canada. Have YOU taken time to be a good dad today?
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
