oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
Randomize
