you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
Randomize
