I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
