i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
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