walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
Randomize
