Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
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