if i can run in heels then i can drive
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
I woke up in a cornfield to shouting, a bottle of Jim Beam, and a bunch of mc muffins. If this doesn't scream Illinois, idk what does.
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
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