I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
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