Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
I'm laying in your front yard are you home
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
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